Manual № 79 · When someone you love is dying

While There Is Time

The manual for when someone you love is dying.

You cannot change how this ends. You can change what happens before it does.

12 modules · for the family member or close friend of someone in the last months, weeks or days of life

  1. 01Where You Are Standing
  2. 02When You Need More Than This
  3. 03Grieving Someone Who Is Still Here
  4. 04What Hospice and Palliative Care Actually Are
  5. 05What Matters Most, and Who Decides
  6. 06Saying What Needs Saying
  1. 07The Family at the Bedside
  2. 08Children and Someone Dying
  3. 09Looking After the One Doing the Looking After
  4. 10What the Last Days Can Look Like
  5. 11The Vigil, and Permission to Leave the Room
  6. 12After: The First Hours, the First Week, and the Months Ahead

Two editions

The manual, or the manual and the toolkit.

Standard edition

$39

The full program: all 12 modules, with the exercises, logs, and checklists that save as you go. Everything you need to do the work.

Elite edition · most complete

$69

Everything in Standard, plus The Toolkit, 14 techniques drawn from across the evidence base, each labeled with where it comes from and how good the support actually is, to use alongside this program rather than instead of it. With original diagrams throughout.

Start with Standard if you would rather. You can upgrade to Elite at any time for the $30 difference, and nothing you have written is lost. And once you own one manual, every other one is 20% off.

Inside The Toolkit

  1. 01Two Directions at Once
  2. 02ABCDE for the Guilt of Grieving Early
  3. 03The Distortions That Visit the Bedside
  4. 04The Problem-Solving Pass
  5. 05Speaking for Them: Substituted Judgment
  6. 06The Things That Need Saying
  7. 07A Legacy Conversation
  1. 08The Letter You May Never Send
  2. 09Making Room for the Wave
  3. 10Getting Through the Worst Hour
  4. 11A Kinder Voice for Yourself
  5. 12The Family Meeting, Planned
  6. 13One Point Up
  7. 14Carrying Them Forward: Continuing Bonds

Close to this one

Educational content, not therapy, diagnosis, or treatment, and not a substitute for a clinician when one is needed. Every manual opens with a safety page. If you are thinking about suicide, call or text 988 now.