Manual № 96 · Compatibility before you commit

Eyes Open

The manual for compatibility before you commit.

Not a test you pass or fail. A clear look at what you are choosing, while you are still choosing it.

12 modules · for a dating or engaged couple deciding whether to make a lifelong commitment, working through it together or one of you alone

  1. 01Starting With Your Eyes Open
  2. 02When This Is Not the Right Tool
  3. 03What Actually Predicts How a Relationship Goes
  4. 04The Inventory
  5. 05Reading Your Map Together
  6. 06What Each of You Brings
  1. 07Children, Faith, and Where You Will Live
  2. 08Money and the Work of a Home
  3. 09How You Disagree Matters More Than What About
  4. 10Sliding Versus Deciding
  5. 11Yes, Not Yet, or No
  6. 12The First Year and the Check-In Habit

Two editions

The manual, or the manual and the toolkit.

Standard edition

$39

The full program: all 12 modules, with the exercises, logs, and checklists that save as you go. Everything you need to do the work.

Elite edition · most complete

$69

Everything in Standard, plus The Toolkit, 14 techniques drawn from across the evidence base, each labeled with where it comes from and how good the support actually is, to use alongside this program rather than instead of it. With original diagrams throughout.

Start with Standard if you would rather. You can upgrade to Elite at any time for the $30 difference, and nothing you have written is lost. And once you have one manual, every other one is 20% off.

Inside The Toolkit

  1. 01Decide the Next Step Out Loud
  2. 02What Is Holding You Here
  3. 03The As-Is Test
  4. 04Both Sides, Weighed Evenly
  5. 05One Number, Once a Week
  6. 06An Ordinary Tuesday, Ten Years On
  7. 07What You Value, Not Only What You Want
  1. 08The Family Map
  2. 09ABCDE for a Doubt
  3. 10Holding the Thought Lightly
  4. 11Wise Mind for a Big Decision
  5. 12The Pattern, Not the Promise
  6. 13Want, Doing, Working
  7. 14Kind to Yourself, Whatever You Decide

Close to this one

Educational content, not therapy, diagnosis, or treatment, and not a substitute for a clinician when one is needed. Every manual opens with a safety page. If you are thinking about suicide, call or text 988 now.